look out piano
Striker
Some of it was a nightmare.
Holiday nightmares
- Thread starter MackneyHackem
- Start date
I went to Canada to meet some bloke I'd met on a porn forum back in 2009.
We'd only ever chatted on msn messenger and I'd only seen 1 picture.
Flight to Canada was good, got into the airport and I was taken to one side and questioned heavily about my stay, they asked questions about him and I only knew minimal stuff, but I'd remembered he was a painter and photographer (so they rang him and confirmed, he was waiting outside of the airport for me).
They also stamped my passport and put dates I had to leave by etc (I'd explained I was only there for a fortnight and I had a home and job to go back to).
Got outside and saw his white Pontiac Firebird (I'd been told about it / seen a pic), walked towards the car and he got out (had short grey hair and was missing a front tooth from an apparent ice hockey incident, he also looked about 20 years older than the pic I'd seen).
There's me getting into a strange man's car (who'd already lied to me), being taken back to his house and I'm thinking "please god don't let him be a serial killer").
Gets to his house, he shows me to a creepy bedroom and by the time I get out of the bedroom back to the living room he's introducing me to Marty who lived in his basement with his ma(I shit thee not
Transpired Marty was getting catfished by some russian chicken who he'd already sent a grand to for a relatives funeral, I made sure he realised what was going on bless him.
Luckily everyone was cool, we smoked a load of pot and Warren even got the Sunderland games on for me as well as taking me to Niagara falls and Wonderland amusement park.
He also took me to his German parents house for a barbecue, his sister was there too. I said "Ahh you're the older sister?", she replied "is that what he's told you?" I just grimaced and realised he was full of shit.
Oh and the photography he did was pornographic in nature as he showed me all of his portfolios (not at his dad's barbecue obviously
In all fairness it was a mint holiday, I thoroughly enjoyed it
onestepbeyond
Subs Bench
I went to Ibiza for a wedding. Me and brother stopped in an apartment. We opened the door to our apartment, walked in and their was a bloke in the bath
Playa del Ingles, Gran Canaria. My ex said I'd love it as I like Spain. It wasn't Spanish at all. He booked an apartment with a balcony overlooking the Yumbo centre, which was eye opening!
Everyday was stay in bed till dinner time. Go to the English pub over the road for an all day fried breakfast. Lay around the pool. Go out for either a Chinese or the all you can eat buffet. Spend the evening drinking in English or Irish pubs and join in the quiz/bingo/karaoke.
Was bored shitless.
Everyday was stay in bed till dinner time. Go to the English pub over the road for an all day fried breakfast. Lay around the pool. Go out for either a Chinese or the all you can eat buffet. Spend the evening drinking in English or Irish pubs and join in the quiz/bingo/karaoke.
Was bored shitless.
Blind Joe Death
Central Defender
The Russian Chicken is the star of this storyI went to Canada to meet some bloke I'd met on a porn forum back in 2009.
We'd only ever chatted on msn messenger and I'd only seen 1 picture.
Flight to Canada was good, got into the airport and I was taken to one side and questioned heavily about my stay, they asked questions about him and I only knew minimal stuff, but I'd remembered he was a painter and photographer (so they rang him and confirmed, he was waiting outside of the airport for me).
They also stamped my passport and put dates I had to leave by etc (I'd explained I was only there for a fortnight and I had a home and job to go back to).
Got outside and saw his white Pontiac Firebird (I'd been told about it / seen a pic), walked towards the car and he got out (had short grey hair and was missing a front tooth from an apparent ice hockey incident, he also looked about 20 years older than the pic I'd seen).
There's me getting into a strange man's car (who'd already lied to me), being taken back to his house and I'm thinking "please god don't let him be a serial killer").
Gets to his house, he shows me to a creepy bedroom and by the time I get out of the bedroom back to the living room he's introducing me to Marty who lived in his basement with his ma
Transpired Marty was getting catfished by some russian chicken who he'd already sent a grand to for a relatives funeral, I made sure he realised what was going on bless him.
Luckily everyone was cool, we smoked a load of pot and Warren even got the Sunderland games on for me as well as taking me to Niagara falls and Wonderland amusement park.
He also took me to his German parents house for a barbecue, his sister was there too. I said "Ahh you're the older sister?", she replied "is that what he's told you?" I just grimaced and realised he was full of shit.
Oh and the photography he did was pornographic in nature as he showed me all of his portfolios (not at his dad's barbecue obviously
In all fairness it was a mint holiday, I thoroughly enjoyed it
ontap
Striker
1. 20 odd years ago. wife and I flew to Florida with AA. Arrived in Miami around 2.15 in the afternoon. We had a flight connection to Orland at 6.30.
We were still queueing to get thru immagration at 6.00pm.
Eventually we get thru , flight has gone. Woman at AA desk says "come back in the morning and we will rebook you".
Wife politely tells her to come up with something better if she wants to keep all that dental work.
She books 10 of us an AA flight to Tampa leaving 9.00pm .
"How far is Tampa from Orlando " I ask.
"90 miles sir"
One of the brits gets on his phone and books a self drive mini bus . $75 each , 9 brits and one young lad from Chile who didn't speak a word of english and no one knew how he had tagged on.
Droped us off about 4.00am at hotel.
I paid the Chilians share , he had no dosh and no hotel booked. We just dropped him off at the side of the road.
It pissed down none stop for the entire week we were there.
2. At Alicante airport about to fly home on a 6.30pm flight. Flight delayed 3hrs.Then , 2hrs more. We were given a dry cheese baguette ( no butter/marg). Eventually they tell us the pilot had been hit on the head by a flap that had come down as he was walking from a plane he had arrived on.
Medical people refused to let him fly for 48hrs.
So, around 1.00am , a couple of coaches arrived and after getting our luggage back we were bussed to a hotel in Alicante that was closed for the winter season. They opened a free bar for two hours which didn't cost em much as I at 50 was just about the youngest on the plane.
Next morning back to airport and everybody was queueing by the bus to get their cases back.
I jumped up like "the man" and started dragging them out and sliding them behind me.
Our lass shouted just as a case hit an old fella , must have been well into his 70's. he went backwards and about 15 of em all went down like dominoes .
I kept a low profile on the flight home.
We were still queueing to get thru immagration at 6.00pm.
Eventually we get thru , flight has gone. Woman at AA desk says "come back in the morning and we will rebook you".
Wife politely tells her to come up with something better if she wants to keep all that dental work.
She books 10 of us an AA flight to Tampa leaving 9.00pm .
"How far is Tampa from Orlando " I ask.
"90 miles sir"
One of the brits gets on his phone and books a self drive mini bus . $75 each , 9 brits and one young lad from Chile who didn't speak a word of english and no one knew how he had tagged on.
Droped us off about 4.00am at hotel.
I paid the Chilians share , he had no dosh and no hotel booked. We just dropped him off at the side of the road.
It pissed down none stop for the entire week we were there.
2. At Alicante airport about to fly home on a 6.30pm flight. Flight delayed 3hrs.Then , 2hrs more. We were given a dry cheese baguette ( no butter/marg). Eventually they tell us the pilot had been hit on the head by a flap that had come down as he was walking from a plane he had arrived on.
Medical people refused to let him fly for 48hrs.
So, around 1.00am , a couple of coaches arrived and after getting our luggage back we were bussed to a hotel in Alicante that was closed for the winter season. They opened a free bar for two hours which didn't cost em much as I at 50 was just about the youngest on the plane.
Next morning back to airport and everybody was queueing by the bus to get their cases back.
I jumped up like "the man" and started dragging them out and sliding them behind me.
Our lass shouted just as a case hit an old fella , must have been well into his 70's. he went backwards and about 15 of em all went down like dominoes .
I kept a low profile on the flight home.
herra soul mob
Winger
so why was it a nightmare ?
Not a penny marra. BA blamed American Airlines (code share partner). We were told as it happened outside of European jurisdiction we wouldn't have a claim for compo. BA didn't even say sorry. They did get us home, eventually, but it spoiled the last night.
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Macho
Striker
I remember you telling this story ages ago and iirc you didn’t do the wild thing. You must have added to the lads portfolio though Babs
Macho
Striker
Sounds canny that tbh, but I like to do as little as possible on holidays.
Pnematic1
Full Back
Not quite holiday but hotel - was on a 2 day course in Stoke ( which is torture enough) with stay over . Couldn’t be arsed with the stop over so came home to my comfy bed ( just 50 minutes drive). I had checked in and the room was pre paid .
Returned at crack of dawn following day , had breakfast and went up to my room to prepare some coursework.
Opened the door and there was a young couple in my bed - they awoke and sat up bewildered - we just stared at each other . Usual “ this is my room “ etc but nothing unpleasant etc . I did the decent thing and left and went to reception fumin.
They said they ( reception)had been in my room ( spooky)the previous evening and noticed it was unoccupied so gave it to a couple who arrived by chance last night.
I stated the room was booked and paid for and it was my choice whether I used it. The couple had also paid.
I left for my course but wrote to the CEO and told him about the embarrassing situation and sharp practice. They gave me 2 nights fully inclusive in their best hotel in Stratford upon Avon.
So…….. I rang the guy ( who had been in my bed - we had swapped numbers so I could report back ) said I was sorry about what happened and gave him and his partner my free trip for Stratford as goodwill even though it wasn’t my fault.
Returned at crack of dawn following day , had breakfast and went up to my room to prepare some coursework.
Opened the door and there was a young couple in my bed - they awoke and sat up bewildered - we just stared at each other . Usual “ this is my room “ etc but nothing unpleasant etc . I did the decent thing and left and went to reception fumin.
They said they ( reception)had been in my room ( spooky)the previous evening and noticed it was unoccupied so gave it to a couple who arrived by chance last night.
I stated the room was booked and paid for and it was my choice whether I used it. The couple had also paid.
I left for my course but wrote to the CEO and told him about the embarrassing situation and sharp practice. They gave me 2 nights fully inclusive in their best hotel in Stratford upon Avon.
So…….. I rang the guy ( who had been in my bed - we had swapped numbers so I could report back ) said I was sorry about what happened and gave him and his partner my free trip for Stratford as goodwill even though it wasn’t my fault.
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look out piano
Striker
It was supposed to say "Russian chick" ffs but bloody autocorrect and that !!!
look out piano
Striker
Nope, any romantic notion went out of the window when he stepped out of his car at the airportI remember you telling this story ages ago and iirc you didn’t do the wild thing. You must have added to the lads portfolio though Babs
. And nope, no pics of rat were taken thankfully (unless he did it when I was akip ).
Dennis
Winger
The number swapping is a bit odd mind
Captain Slackbladder
Winger
I caught Covid last year 4 days into a 2 week holiday in florida.....floored and confined to the hotel apartment for a few days....completely wiped me out. Mrs and kids were fine...
Pnematic1
Full Back
Aye - it was an odd moment but I just said I’d sort it out with reception and let him know the score - they were happy with that - it was an embarrassing encounter to say the least.
Goat Eyes
Striker
Was it @Dave Herbal?
