Classic comedy lines..

[air asia]

you can't really dust for vomit

 

[busterish]

"I come from another planet. It is a very different planet to this one. We have no death, no gravity and a different shaped gear knob on the Mini Metro"

 

[Parkmaverick]

You can see the sea...it's over there between the land and the sky.

Should put the rest in

 

[Skandhaless]

F##k this, one seventy, one seventy, one seventy.

I remember when that joke went " penny, penny , tanner , bob , fuck it 1 & 8 , 1 &8 , 1 &8" . We had rhythm then

Following an accusation from his wife Barbie (Nina Baden-Semper), Bill (Rudolph Walker) replied:

"How can I be a racist, I'm black?"

In the context of the programme (Love Thy Neighbour) it was funny but it seems to me that many now act as if they believe that to be true, in much the same way as they seem to think that only men are capable of being sexist etc, etc, etc.

Or in much the same way as some people used to find that stuff funny and relevant in the 70's and still do is the other way of looking at it .
On a lighter note " he never said owt about a pot of paint did he ?"

 

[Lions Play]

'Brace yourself Eddie, this might just make your eyes water'

'I am smoking a fag!!!'

 

[fishboy]

Groucho Manx in duck soup.

Where is your husband ?
He's dead
Really, I bet he's just using that as an excuse.

 

[Flash Gordon]

Taggart: Well, that's where we go a-ridin' into town, a-whompin' and a-whumpin' every livin' thing that moves within an inch of its life. Except the women folks, of course.
Hedley Lamarr: You spare the women?
Taggart: Naw, we rape the shit out of them at the Number Six Dance later on.

It shouldn't be as funny as it is, but Blazing Saddles is quality!

 

[Johnap]

Another Groucho Marx - "...and remember you are fighting for this lady's honour which is probably more than she ever did."

 

[Kid Galahad]

Doc "Are you a practising homosexual?'
Fletch " What with these feet! "

 

[KarenDent]

I've not read all the thread, but has "a pint.Thats very nearly an armfull" been done yet?

Well done Ivan ya bassa am wel jel I nivvor thowt a that

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[Qwerty]

Cough up we're having a whip round for the driver.

Driver?

Well pilot like.

 

[TwasOnTheFifthOfMay]

"Kryten, select 36D as the breast size for the new computer! That's an order."