MackneyHackem
Striker
One of my mates is a lorry driver. He is a world authority on Service stations.
He knows how far away you are from one and even which ones have the best sausage rolls. He knows where the best place to park is - absolutely everything.
Mind on every on single bit of intelligence he is beyond useless. Ask him what’s the capital of Brazil and his head might burst into flames.
Being good at geography is great on quiz shoes but useless when you want a sausage roll and a cup of tea.
I fed a tiger at at Whipsnade Zoo a few years ago.
I have a friend called Felix who's just moved back to Athens after living in California for 18 months.
I just finished off a jar of mango chutney so I've added it to my shopping list for later in the week.
I once farted on the set of Blue Lagoon.