Office/work-based things that make you want to die

Status
Not open for further replies.
Mackem00 said:
There'll be a thread on the lasses version of the smb* titled "the new spenky lad in the office" around about now imo.

*anarr lasses post on here but ye narr what i mean.
Click to expand...

I'm easily the least spenky lad in the office. I'm wearing trainers for work ffs.
 


Teed said:
When the office lasses talk and you're so paranoid you think it's some kind of code language and they'e really talking about you.
Click to expand...

What does 'shall we go for sushi together at lunchtime Seb?' really mean then?
 
f***ing shit bureaucratic processes underpinned by poorly implemented IT systems, where nothing is written down so it's all f***ing guesswork how it's supposed to be done. And when you absolutely, positively need to get something important done for the good of the business, it all f***ing falls down because some useless ballbag didn't think to set things up properly. And when you try and get it no sorted, you are stuck dealing with some obstructive, time serving knobend who has no interest in actually sorting out a problem that is more important than his f***ing morning dump reading the paper and only stops talking in indecipherable f***ing acronyms when his life is threatened.
 
Cockney Mackem said:
f***ing shit bureaucratic processes underpinned by poorly implemented IT systems, where nothing is written down so it's all f***ing guesswork how it's supposed to be done. And when you absolutely, positively need to get something important done for the good of the business, it all f***ing falls down because some useless ballbag didn't think to set things up properly. And when you try and get it no sorted, you are stuck dealing with some obstructive, time serving knobend who has no interest in actually sorting out a problem that is more important than his f***ing morning dump reading the paper and only stops talking in indecipherable f***ing acronyms when his life is threatened.
Click to expand...
:):lol:
 
Cockney Mackem said:
f***ing shit bureaucratic processes underpinned by poorly implemented IT systems, where nothing is written down so it's all f***ing guesswork how it's supposed to be done. And when you absolutely, positively need to get something important done for the good of the business, it all f***ing falls down because some useless ballbag didn't think to set things up properly. And when you try and get it no sorted, you are stuck dealing with some obstructive, time serving knobend who has no interest in actually sorting out a problem that is more important than his f***ing morning dump reading the paper and only stops talking in indecipherable f***ing acronyms when his life is threatened.
Click to expand...
I thought this was just the norm in every office.
 
Cockney Mackem said:
f***ing shit bureaucratic processes underpinned by poorly implemented IT systems, where nothing is written down so it's all f***ing guesswork how it's supposed to be done. And when you absolutely, positively need to get something important done for the good of the business, it all f***ing falls down because some useless ballbag didn't think to set things up properly. And when you try and get it no sorted, you are stuck dealing with some obstructive, time serving knobend who has no interest in actually sorting out a problem that is more important than his f***ing morning dump reading the paper and only stops talking in indecipherable f***ing acronyms when his life is threatened.
Click to expand...
I remember working in an office where we had an IT guy who looked after the phones - they'd went down for the third time in two weeks and our manager called him in to sort it, understandably pissed off.

He asked the IT staff why this was a recurring problem and he got something about how the systems were "currently an open field" and that he was working to make them "impregnable" but the new updates "hadn't made any impact on the issue" in one sentence. He just started shouting fuck off and telling him to get out of the office :lol:
 
Sebasaurus II said:
Again though, sushi's fresh, maybe something is fresh...probably my trainers or my new t-shirt.
Click to expand...
See! now you're getting the idea, one time, when someone farted, people would say "by!,,, your a bit fresh" meaning they stunk, thinking out the box is what it's all about for a code breaker...;)
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Back
Top